


Your Eyes Of Death

by lovelylittleliar



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Death, Demons, F/M, Shinigami
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-03
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2017-12-31 09:15:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1029936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelylittleliar/pseuds/lovelylittleliar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rachel fell off a roof one night. She landed on her head and forgot everything. This is her story, one of forbidden love, relinquished hate, and inevitably- death.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Fall

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally published on Fanfiction.net, but the writing style needed to be improved on and the whole plot development needed to be redone, so this will be longer than it was previously. This chapter was a little boring, but I promise the next chapter will be a lot better!

I took a shaky breath and tried to jerk my body into a sitting position, but my head made contact with something hard. The force of hitting my head made me lay back down. I gripped my head from the impact; it throbbed slightly from the impact, so I started to feel along the side of the box I was in while my eyes dilated from the lack of light. I noticed that the walls were made from what felt like cheap wood. I continued to feel along the top of the box, it had a caved dimension to it, and then it dawned on me, I was in a coffin. I knocked on the top of it, not like anyone around me didn’t hear the sound of my head hitting it only seconds before, holding back my worry or fear of being buried alive. A panic attack loomed on the horizon. 

The top of it moved slightly and I heard a voice talking, "Did the knocking come from this one? Or that one?" 

The lid moved off of the box that held me, "Oh~ look you're still alive!" 

A man stood, holding the lid far enough away to see inside but not far enough away that I could get out. His hair went down his back, hung around his head, and hid his eyes. I glared at him slightly and tried to   
sit up again, so he sat the lid on the ground next to the coffin which allowed me to finally sit up.

"Where am I?" I asked looking around the dark room. 

"Well, you're in my shop! I'm the undertaker you see, and the people who brought you in must have thought you were dead." 

"Can you walk? You took a pretty hard fall, from what I've heard." 

I looked down at my hands, making my hair fall down onto my shoulders, “I think I can, but the funny thing is I don't remember much of anything at the moment." 

He walked to the back of the room and pulled a vase off of a shelf that seemed to be filled with what looked like bones in it, "I see. So you just fell off of a roof and forgot everything?"

The door opened, and a child walked in. I slowly pulled myself out of the coffin. My skirt swished around my body 

"I'm coming in," He announced. His voice had an important undertone in it, but there was something else hidden in it. Something that sounded familiar, 

The undertaker walked up to him, "What can I do for you today, little lord?"

The boy stood with a lot of authority, which somewhat annoyed me. "There has been a string of murders and kidnappings lately- who are you?" The boy seemed to be impatient as he met my eyes. I looked   
toward the ground, not knowing how to answer. 

Undertaker grabbed a bone from the vase or urn he was holding and put it in his mouth. "She wasn’t quite dead when she was delivered this morning, hehehe," He stopped and thought for a second, "I might have some information on the recent murders. This time it's free of charge. I’m feeling rather generous today," Undertaker sat down on a raised coffin and started to talk about these murders. I tuned out and looked at the kid, with him what appeared to be his butler. 

He and I made eye contact; his eyes looked somehow familiar to me; they reminded me of something that I should recognize. I broke eye contact and looked at the floor. My heard throbbed rhythmically.  
"Who was he?" I asked after they left. 

"The Earl, would you like one?" He offered a cookie in the shape of a bone to me, but I quickly declined. 

"His name is Ciel Phantomhive, he's quite a regular here," The undertaker continued.

I stared at the floor, "Do you know who I am?" 

The white haired man stopped and looked at me, "No I have no idea. Some men brought you this morning saying they found you beside their house in a pool of your blood. I didn’t have time to clean you up yet, hehehe. They thought you fell from the roof, even they didn't know who you are or how you got up there.”

He nibbled on another bone, "Your eyes though, show to prove that you aren't human though." 

I stopped breathing, my eyes? Aren’t eyes just eyes, so how would they prove that I wasn’t human? Are they some strange color, or are they completely black? Why didn’t the child say anything about them?

"Why do they make me not human?" I asked, completely straightforward. It seemed like today wasn’t going to be a pleasant day for me, at least. 

"It’s a double iris, hehehe," He laughed, a very strange laugh. 

"A double iris?" 

“Your eyes are a dark red and yellow,” He smiled, which was almost as strange as his laugh, “It’s a strange color combination even for Shinigami.”

“Shinigami? You’re implying that I’m a god of death?”

“You're probably missing from HQ," He seemed to ignore my question, “I should bring you back there. Hehehe.”

I glared though it was more of a squint because the light was starting to hurt my head as well, "Headquarters? There are a lot more then?”

“Of course there is! It would be way too much work just a few reapers!” He giggled once again and leaned back on the coffin. His cookies were forgotten for the time being.

“What, I don’t think I understand everything,” I asked. I couldn’t remember my name. I couldn’t remember anything about myself, but my head was starting to pound, and I reached out to grab something to steady myself.

"Maybe you should lie down,” He responded, his personality somewhat changed. He seemed more calm and less happy go lucky. 

“Yeah that sounds good,” I remarked. I was somewhat panicked on the side though. I somewhat remember a few faces. I felt like I remembered something. Bright red eyes. They were staring at me, and all I could do was run but I didn’t. I couldn’t run. My headache steadily got worse

“Sit here, and I’ll be right back! Hehehe,” He smiled, pointed to a chair, and went to the back of the room. I fell into the chair and rubbed my eyes, trying to rid myself of the massive headache that had appeared out of nowhere.

He picked up a book from a shelf and held it out in front of me, “Can you read this?”

I just stopped for a second and took the book from him. As I gently opened the front cover, pictures flashed before my eyes. I watched as this man lived his entire life. It was over within a second, and my head began to hurt even worse when I closed the book.

“So what did you see?~” He asked and held out his hands for the book. 

I happily handed it over, but my mind was racing ahead. It had a name. I knew the name of what I just watched. I looked at his face again, “I know what it is, but I just can’t remember what it’s called.”

He giggled again and sat the book down on the desk, “It’s a cinematic record, child.”

I frowned slightly when he called me a child but still nodded my head. Of course I knew that. I just couldn’t think of the right words. I let my head fall into my hands, trying to calm my migraine.

“Okay, I remember that, somewhat, now what?” I really needed another nap. It would help me concentrate better. 

Undertaker looked toward me and frowned, “Well, I think there’s something off about you. Stay here for a while, at least until someone comes looking for you, hehehe.”

I looked at him, mouth pressed firmly closed. I just wanted to sleep. I looked to the ground; my skirt moved around my. The feel of the fabric felt hard, like something had dried on it. Like something thick had dried on it. 

I glanced down and picked up the top of my skirt, only to figure out that there was something dried on my skirt. I found myself in a somewhat panic, there was blood on my skirt. Who’s blood was it? I looked up at him, “Why am I covered in blood?”

“You fell off a roof and cracked your head open!” Undertaker replied with a bit too much joy.

“C-can I change?” I whispered. Having blood cover my clothes wasn’t something I wanted to think about. I leaned back in the chair, trying not to think about the blood I was covered in. Undertaker trotted over to a chest and pulled out a straight black dress. 

“You can change in the back room if you want,” He handed me the black dress, which I was very thankful for, and pointed to a doorway. I moved toward to the door with the dress. My balance was slightly off and I almost fell when I moved passed Undertaker, but he caught me and helped me get steady on my feet again.

“Do you need help?” He asked, unusual concern in his voice. I shook my head and moved behind the door. My dress easily unzipped; I left my corset on even though the back was stained with blood, and then I   
slipped on the new dress. I wasn’t as long as my other one, but it flowed better and was easier to move in. I heard the bell from the door, but I didn’t hear voices, so I assumed it was nothing until the door I was standing behind flew open. I almost tried not to look surprised from the door flying open.

“There are people here to see you,” Undertaker announced. I grabbed my dirty dress and walked out of the room. I felt a little better after I changed. 

“Rachel!” Someone called out, causing my head to start throbbing again. So that was my name, it sounded very familiar. I put my hand to my head in order to make it stop but to no avail, “We’ve been looking for   
you everywhere! Ronald said you might be here, and I guess he was right.”

I glanced up to see two people standing with Undertaker. One had long red head and the other was shorter with short hair. I nodded to them, but I didn’t recognize them at all. 

“Who are you?” I asked quietly. I felt bad for asking, but I couldn’t remember. The taller one looked hurt.

“You don’t remember me?” The redhead asked. Undertaker finally took a step forward and cleared his throat.

“Rachel here seems to have lost her memory when she took a fall off a roof last night, hehehe,” He giggled a little before continuing, “She seems to have a concussion, but I want to know why she’s so far from   
headquarters?”

Ronald looked toward the ground, and the red head looked awfully confused.

“She was with us because she wanted to go see what we did every day, but I guess I lost her when we were leaving last night,” Ronald explained carefully. 

“I see~,” Undertaker smiled and looked back at me, “Why don’t you let her stay here for a while and I’ll bring her by when she feels better.”

“I don’t think William is going to be happy about that,” The redhead muttered, “I think he’ll want to see her before anything is settled.”

“Just tell him Undertaker is taking good care of her,” Undertaker replied. The two looked at each other and turned to leave.


	2. First Reaping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel has begun her training as a Shinigami, but she encounters some problems along the way. It seems as though the road is going to be a little bit bumpy from here on out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finally finished editing the new chapter, and it turned out to be 3K+ words which makes me really happy because my chapters sometimes barely reach 1K words. I hope you all enjoy the new chapter. The next one should be out by Christmas, hopefully!

The two left reluctantly; Ronald looked back for a second before walking out of the door. I looked toward Undertaker, my head still throbbed steadily. He smiled and looked at me again. His hair still covered his eyes and the rest of it hung around his head nicely. 

"Oh you'll need a place to sleep! Any of the coffins are fine unless they're up again that wall," He pointed to the farthest wall, "Or you can have the one that you woke up in that's fine." 

I nodded, "I have to sleep in a coffin? I don’t know, Undertaker.”

“Of course! Where else you sleep?”

I looked at the place I had woken up in, grimaced, but accepted me fate, “My head hurts, so I’ll just go back to sleep." 

He put his finger to his mouth in thought, "No you probably have a concussion, so you need to stay awake for a while, hehehe! We have work to do anyway.”

“What kind of work?” I asked. I really wanted to crawl somewhere dark and quiet instead of going with him. He laughed again and walked toward the door. 

“We need to see your records, but I don’t think that you’ll have very many,” Undertaker responded. He seemed to have ulterior motives for helping me. I couldn’t quite place what they might be though. 

I sucked up the pain and followed him out the door, “What do you mean by records?”

“Every reaper has records; even secretaries have records that are kept in the library. It gives the origins and currents statuses of the shinigami.”

“Oh, I see.”

I stared at him as he walked toward the alley way. I hesitantly followed him. I didn’t know if he would hurt me in anyway if I followed him down an empty, dark alley, but I really had no other choice than to follow   
him. I could feel my heart speed up though. 

The sun was setting, so the streets were getting darker by the minute. Undertaker took a sudden turn; by the time I turned to follow him, he was gone from my view. My breath quicken as I looked around for him.   
I felt a hand cover my mouth, and someone wrapped their other arm around my waist. I tried to scream in fright, but I couldn’t breathe. I watched the ground get farther away, and we gently landed on the roof.

"Scare you, didn't I?" Undertaker laughed. 

I dusted myself off and calmly tried to recollect my thoughts, “Please don’t do that again. You scared the living hell out of me.”

He laughed manically at me. I frowned as my heartbeat slowed to a steadier pace. He seemed to be very entertained by my reactions. He’s probably using me for some game of his. I wrapped my arms around my waist protectively while meticulously watching him for some other sudden move. 

“We need to go to the reaper realm,” He started to explain, “Maybe it’ll help you to remember something?” 

I shrugged a little bit. I doubted that my name was even Rachel at this point. It didn’t sound like it fit right. Visiting this place should put things into place better, I hoped at least. He pulled something out of his sleeve, and a circle of white light appeared in front of us. He smiled back at me and held out his hand for me to take. I hesitantly took it; he pulled me into the light. I had my eyes close as soon as our hands met, so I didn’t see the journey through the light, but I opened them as soon as my feet hit something solid again. He smiled as he looked around the room. I looked around the room in slight awe, too bad it didn’t remind me of anything. 

“Well, I hope your record is somewhere in here,” He said happily. His hands folded together in front of him as he walked toward the back of the enormous room we were in. I slowly followed him, my eyes never leaving the vast shelves of books and other things that litter them. There were statues, small ones and life size ones, throughout the room. 

Undertaker hummed as he wondered through the shelves, looking for something. I tried to keep up with his long, quick pace. But ultimately I failed in that, so I settled for a much slower, decent pace. His fingers searched through titles. His humming never ceased, and my head never stopped throbbing. My legs were tired, and I just wanted to sit down or go to sleep. 

“It’s not here,” Undertaker’s voice resonated throughout the aisle we stood in, “Your record isn’t here. It’s that interesting?~”

“I guess, but I don’t understand,” I responded, “Why would everyone’s records be in here. Wouldn’t that just mean you could look up your own record and see things that you might have forgotten, or things people didn’t want you to know?”

“Well, most Shinigami aren’t allowed back here, so no one really has access to their own records darling,” His voice sounded slightly condescending, but I overlooked it, “I’m one of the few that’s allowed in this part of the library whenever I please, hehehe.”

“Oh, I see,” I looked toward the ground, wondering why he was special enough to be allowed where ever he pleased without consequence. 

“There isn’t anything here for us, so we’re going to the Death Scythe building now,” He responded almost sadly. Undertaker smiled and turned toward a door I overlooked earlier. 

He opened the door and walked through but didn’t keep it open for me. I found it kind of odd that he would forget about me, walking right behind him. The door didn’t hit me though. He walked down a long hallway; I followed silently behind him. I didn’t feel like talking to him about holding the door open, it seemed like a petty little thing. He turned left, then right, then left again. I soon got lost in the long, white hallways. 

“Undertaker?” I asked quietly, “Where exactly are we going?”

“We’re going to get you a death scythe,” he explained. 

I stared at the floor as we walked. ‘A Death Scythe?’ I thought to myself, ‘Why does that sound so familiar.’ He took a few more turns then stopped outside a door that had perfect letters printed on the outside of its plainness, ‘Death Scythe’.

Undertaker opened the door and strode in with uncanny confidence. I followed more slowly, pulling the door closed behind me. It was a fairly large room with wooden poles against some walls, and carved handles against the other walls, and finally metal sheets lay out on a table in the middle of the room.

“Undertaker! It’s nice to see you back!” A voice called from the back, “What can I help you with today? I haven’t quite finished your special order yet though.”

“No, it’s not for me today, but for me trainee,” Undertaker replied, “I need for her to get a death scythe today.”

I walked toward him a little ways, watching the other man closely. He was short and stocky, but he looked strong and resilient. His gaze locked with mine, and he shook his head.

“Women aren’t supposed to in the reaping field Undertaker,” He explained slowly, “They’re meant to be pretty and doll-like and just sit there. They’re too weak, too stupid-”

Undertaker stepped up to the man, easily towering over him. He didn’t say anything for a second before moving back slightly, “I don’t think we’ll have much trouble. I just need a beginners scythe.”

I stood back. His attitude changed completely. It was slightly terrifying to watch. The man he was conversing with nodded his head slightly and turned to walk to the bad room. 

Undertaker smiled at me then turned back to where the man had gone. He cocked his head slightly to the right when he walked back out carrying a bland scythe. It had a black handle and a shining silver blade on the top of it.

“There you are, Undertaker,” The man handed his scythe to Undertaker and turned away. Undertaker grabbed it and handed it to me. 

“Don’t lose this, Rachel,” He warned happily. I nodded my head and gripped the handle tightly. We turned and left the room; as I was walking out of the room, I glanced back only to be met with a hateful gaze. Undertaker walked down more hallways. I stopped trying to keep up with the random turns and curves, but instead, I started to watch as the doors passed by. Some doors had numbers on them others had names on them. 

I was feeling a bit better, but my head was still spinning. Undertaker looked back at me before turning into an open door. I followed him quickly, hoping that I could go to sleep soon.

“Undertaker,” A man greeted him, “Can I help you today?”

“I need to be set up with the list of souls to be reaped again,” He asked. He was much more serious now, “It’s actually for Rachel right now, but I’m going to be her mentor for now.”

“A woman?” The man scoffed, “Women can’t do anything in the field, Undertaker. You of all people should know that.” 

Undertaker leaned forward a little bit, “I think that you’ll find that women can do a lot more than you think.” 

I stood back, wrapping my arms around my waist. It was rather curious that everyone immediately deemed me unfit to help them in any way. I watched the man shake his head and move papers out of the way before writing something down and pulling a small book off a shelf behind him.

“Thank you good sir!” Undertaker gladly took the book from him and turned to grab my shoulders and guide me out of the room.

I followed him back through the winding hallways until we reached a huge, dark wooden door. Undertaker stopped at the door and turned toward me.

“Madam Rachel, I hope you’re ready for your training because it’s going to be hard,” He announced, “We’ve never had a woman work in the field, especially not one like you.”

It sounded as though he knew something about me, something I didn’t know but needed to know. I nodded my head in agreement. He seemed to like my response and headed opened the doors. As he opened the doors, white light flashed into the room, and it gradually diminished into a calmer, duller light.

Undertaker finished opening the doors to reveal a midnight street that looked oddly familiar. My head pounded harder trying to think as to where I had originally seen it before. Undertaker walked to the street, and I took note to follow him.

I quickly caught up with him. He had a much longer stride than I did, and, to top it off, he had a much faster pace. I had to almost jog to keep up and the corset wasn’t helping in the least. I contemplated undoing it while walking down the street with him.

“You’ll need different clothes by tomorrow morning,” Undertaker mumbled aloud, “You can’t run or jump well in such a silly dress like that.”

I agreed with him without any words. I was sincerely thankful that he knew how hard it was to move around in this dress. He stopped in front of his shop, and I suddenly remembered with road it was that we were on. 

“I think it’s about time you took a small nap,” Undertaker replied, moving around some coffins, “You’ve been looking awfully bad recently, so I suggest sleeping in the coffin you woke up in.”

I nodded my head in agreement. I really wasn’t too excited about sleeping in the coffin though. It seemed a little creepy to me. I felt as though I was going to fall asleep standing there, so I didn’t put up an argument. The lid was still off of the coffin. I climbed in and fell asleep as soon as my head hit the bottom of it. 

I woke up with a start, almost banging my head on the roof of the coffin. I frowned then sighed. It seemed as though his goal was to scare me, but it was making me more annoyed than anything. I pushed the lid up and slightly to the left. It was a lot heavier than I originally thought. 

I moved it a little bit before it fell back down. The noise echoed throughout the small space quickly. I quickly noticed that my head didn’t hurt near as much as it had before. It seemed like I was finally getting   
better.

The lid moved slowly off of the coffin, and I sat up. I glared at Undertaker while he placed it on the ground next to me. I sat up, and he held out his hand for me to take. I stood up and leaned back a little bit, sleeping in a coffin was not good for me. 

Undertaker skipped across the room again and picked up a small book and what looked to be a smaller skirt and a suit jacket. He turned, smiled, and held them out for me to take. I lightly picked up the book and clothes from his hand. The book had perfectly written letters on it saying ‘Death List’, and the clothes were much lighter than what i was currently wearing. Undertaker motioned me to the back room where I could change, but as soon as I entered the room, I opened the book and looked inside.

I frowned a little bit at the name but opened it. There were names, addresses, and times written in perfect handwriting on the inside of it. I shrugged slightly and started to undress. The new clothes showed off quite a bit of skin. It made me feel too exposed, but it was easy to move in. 

I exited the room with my old clothes and the book in my hands. I set the clothes down on the coffin I had slept in and reopened the book. I looked through the pages, just a names and numbers really.

“What do you want me to do with this?” I asked quickly. 

“I’m going to show and help you complete the death list tonight. I’m going to help you doll, and tomorrow you’re going to complete the next one with just my instructions and so on and so forth, doll!~” Undertaker explained happily. 

I shook my head slightly, “So what do I have to do tonight?”

“You have to observe me child,” Undertaker seemed to not like simplifying things; I’ll have to remember that later on, “Grab your scythe, and let’s leave.”

I picked up my scythe which I had discarded somewhere in the room in my haste to finally sleep. It felt light and balanced in my hand. I loved it. My other hand straightened my dress slightly, and I followed him out the door. 

We walked down the numerous streets. I gave up on memorizing them and just followed Undertaker. The moon was hidden underneath a shadow, and the lights weren’t very bright. No one was out. Undertaker turned to an alley and pulled my arm. I frowned yet followed him. He turned around and faced me, placed a single finger against his lips, and grabbed my waist. 

I barely kept from screaming when he jumped up and onto the roof. We landed, surprisingly, lightly on the hard surface. He looked around and then grabbed the book out of my hand. I watched him flipped through the book carefully, looking for a certain page. 

He smiled and turned the book back to me. I grabbed it and read the top line.

“Jane Holmes   
Aged: 45 years and 25 days  
Cause of Death: Blood loss  
Reaping Date: July 19th 1898”

“So Ms. Jane Holmes is going to die soon?” I asked, “And I need to reap her?”

Undertaker nodded, “You will watch me reap her then I’ll guide you through the next one.”

Undertaker walked to the edge of the roof and turned toward me, “Follow me, love.”

I watched him step off the roof and fall down the side of the building. There was the sound of something hitting metal, so I ran over to the edge just to watch him staring up at him. It was a good 6 foot drop, but it was possible for me to jump down with him. I took a deep breath and stepped off the edge to fall beside him.

He looked pleased that I didn’t argue with him; the window we were beside was open, and the hallway it leads too was completely empty. Undertaker opened the window quickly and quietly. His gracefulness was quiet surprising. He motioned for me to follow him into the building.

People were shouting orders at one another while running down the hallway. Undertaker pushed me against the wall and ‘sh’ed me. I watched the people run, some were nurses and others were doctors. There was   
a small trail of blood leading the way, so Undertaker took that as a clue to follow it, and we did. 

The team gathered in a room, but no one took any noticed of us when we entered it. Undertaker left his hand and a scythe appeared beside him. The top had a skull on it and around it had what looked to be wire. He raised it with one arm, though I thought it to weigh half as much as I did. 

I looked back to the women, mouth falling open in shock. The record was seeping out of skin, mouth and eyes. It was rather gruesome. It started to surround me, causing me to panic. I leaned back against Undertaker. The record was surrounding me and growing tighter. 

The doctors seemed to have given up and slowly left the room. I watched as the record moved around me; it was no longer getting any tighter but I watched as the woman’s life passed around me. It was a rather plain life, so I really took no mind to it. 

Undertaker brought his scythe down on her chest, and the record wrapped around it nicely. He cut through it. It disappeared from around me, and I breathed a sigh of relief. He set the scythe back down and smiled slightly.

“Come on, doll,” He walked to the window and opened it, “We have a few more for tonight.”

“U-Undertaker, can I ask you a question?” I hesitantly replied before following him to the window.

“What is it; we need to hurry,” He frowned slightly.

“What was wrong with her?” I asked. I was almost positive that he saw the record slipping out of her dying form.

Undertaker turned around and gently stroked the dead girls face, “She was murdered by her only son. I sent her to Heaven which you will get to decide where the next person goes.”

“No, why was her cinematic record leaking out of her skin before you cut into her?” I questioned him again. It seemed as though he really didn’t know what was going on.

He rushed up to me and raised my chin up with his blood covered finger, “What do you mean by that, doll?”

“Well when we walked in, the record was raising out of her skin and then it wrapped itself around me, and I kind of panicked, but once you cut it, it disappeared,” I explained quickly.

“Her record was leaking out of her skin you say?” Undertaker replied quickly, “What an interesting thing!”

I smiled meekly at his response but didn’t push the question any further. If he needed to explain at some point, he would. At least I assumed he would. 

We made our way out the window and down the fire escape. The next man to die was across the street and a few blocks away. He was drunk and passed out behind a bar. Undertaker had obviously picked this man for me to reap because of his isolation. Not a single soul was around him. 

Undertaker stayed near the front of the alley obviously prepared to intervene if I did something horribly wrong. I held my scythe to his neck. My left hand twitched slightly. I hoped it was normal for someone to be this nervous. The moment I actually looked at him the cinematic record started to push its way out of his skin. 

It was hard to ignore when it started to wrap around my eyes even more so when I felt the need to bite into it. I pulled back almost instantly and swung my scythe through it. His life flashed before me. From birth until just a few seconds ago. A horrid life to have, but his good deeds could never outweigh his bad deeds, and I felt his soul fall.

Undertaker came up behind me and nodded his head, “Tell me Rachel. How was it?”

“I don’t know really. I still saw the record coming out of him right before I cut him, but this time it was different,” I admitted. I didn’t need him to know that I wanted to bite into it; he might think that there was a lot more wrong with me if I did. 

“The record is still showing huh?” Undertaker smiled again, “What was different this time?”

“I think it’s because I was alone this time,” I tried to lie smoothly, “It will probably take a while for me to get use to something like that, Undertaker.”


	3. Helping Reaping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad to finally have this chapter done, but this is the chapter where things start to slow down with the plot. The plot doesn't change it's just trying to make the characters less OOC and whatnot.   
> Enjoy!

My dreams were vivid but forgotten. I was startled awake by these dreams throughout the night, almost banging my head against the top of the coffin every other time. I was lulled back to sleep by some foreign comfort, almost a song. It resonated from the back of my mind, and I easily fell asleep. 

I woke up in the same coffin again, but I wasn't ready to get up. My dreams still terrified me. I laid there for a while longer; I could hear Undertaker walking around the shop. His boots clanked lightly on the floor. 

The bell ring and some voice talk to him, but I still didn't move from my spot. It was slowly becoming more and more normal to sleep in the coffin. The voice slowly disappeared and the bell rang again. I felt the lid slide back and I glared at the small pieces of sunlight fall into my eyes. 

"Wake up darling, Rachel!~" He moved my hair out of my face which made me frown.

"Yeah, I know, I'm getting up," I looked around the room. The room didn’t have very many windows in it, so I assumed it was about midday.

"I have work today, so you're won’t have a death list today," He grinned at me. 

"I thought I was going alone tonight anyway?" I asked rather confused; he didn't reply though. He frowned slightly though, "Is something wrong?" 

He turned around, "I haven't seen you smile; why don't you smile?"

I sat up in the coffin, "I don’t know. My smile isn’t very pretty anyway."

“Oh, I don’t think that, doll,” Undertaker replied, “Why not give me a smile today, hmm?”

I shook my head slightly and got out of the coffin. I finally looked at it closely. It was made from dark wood and satin cloth. I felt as though it was too special for me. Undertaker seemed satisfied enough with my lack of answer.

He walked into the back and came back with an empty, metal table. I followed him to the far side of the room where it seemed a body had been laid. Undertaker easily picked it up and laid it on the table. He rolled it to the back of the shop while I followed him. 

"Something is wrong. Didn’t I do everything right last night?" I asked, wondering if I had actually done something wrong last night. I had finished every reaping perfectly.

He didn't respond to my comment or question. I watched him lightly stroke the corpses face. His nail went smoothly down her cheek as he lips curved into a delicate grin. He drained the blood from the body with a needle he had gotten from a small table next to him. I watched him work, but strangely enough, I wasn’t disgusted with the work. 

“You’re an interesting girl, Rachel, but it’s against the rules of a Shinigami to allow their student out on their own without given every instruction possible,” Undertaker announced while finishing the girl, “Do you know what the best day for a human is?”

I shook my head in response.

“It’s the day of their funeral,” Undertaker explained, “It shows them at their very best and for who they truly were and sometimes for whom they could have been. It’s a wonderful day.”

"Oh I see. That’s really interesting. Can I ask you a question?" 

"Yes, what is it?" 

“Why did you take me in? You could've left me at the society," I mumbled. 

“You’re very interesting Rachel. I’m sure a lot of Reapers wanted to mentor you in becoming a full fledge Shinigami though they would never admit it.”

I stared at him for a minute, strange that so many would be willing, yet so many of them were against women in the field. I felt somewhat offended by this but didn’t say anything. I don’t think he really wanted me to say anything else about it.

“This corpse, reminds me of someone else almost,” Undertaker started, smiling at the body once again, “Someone who I would have loved to cleaned up and dressed up. She would have been beautiful lying in the coffin. All dressed in beautiful lace with flowers surrounding her. I don’t know if I would have been able to bury her though. Her beauty was almost breathtaking.”

“Who?” I was curious as to who he could speak so highly of. It seemed a little farfetched that he might have been really fond of someone special, but it almost sounded as though he had lost the corpse somehow. 

Undertaker seemed to not hear me and placed the girl in a coffin and rolled it to the front of the shop. I watched him curious as to why he didn’t answer my question. If he did answer, it was almost positively going to be someone I didn’t know.

Undertaker turned toward me and smiled, “You know it’s kind of late; why don’t you go to sleep?”

“No, I think I’m fine. I can sleep later,” I responded quickly; I really wanted to know who he thought was perfect, “Are you going to tell me who?”

He chuckled almost darkly. I wanted to hit him until he told me, but I refrained from it for the time being. He turned away from me and started on another corpse. The light had faded from the room. I looked around the room for some source of light. Finding some unused candles, I lit them. The room lit up nicely, and I continued to watch him work.

He hummed while he worked. It sounded like a lullaby, awfully familiar too. I almost started to hum along with him, but Undertaker quickly stopped humming. I stared at him for a while longer. My stomach growled loudly. I frowned and realized that he wasn’t paying any attention to me, so I would have to go find some food on my own.

I walked to the back of the shop and found a small kitchen. He didn’t have much of anything in there. Actually he only had tea and those cookies he ate normally. I picked up a cookie and took a bite of it. It tasted rather bland and old. He didn’t have anything to make more with, so I left the room after finishing the rest of the cookie. It would a shame to waste them. 

Undertaker had finished the corpse and was lining up the rest of the coffins when I walked in. He didn’t acknowledge me. I watched him for a while longer; the sun was finally gone beyond the horizon. The street outside was almost silent except for the random and lone calls of the drunks near the end of the street.

The shop was deathly quiet. You could hear our breathing as he finished cleaning up the tables. To keep myself busy, trying to ignore the silence that bloated the air, I organized the coffins around the room. I would catch Undertaker looking at me when he thought I wasn’t looking.

“Do you need something?” I asked politely. His constant glances had begun to get on my nerves.

“Why are you rearranging my coffins?”

“It’s better this way,” I explained, “It’s easier to walk around the room, so I took it upon myself to move them.”

“Rachel,” Undertaker sat down on the coffin I was trying to move, “You’re going to strain yourself. You still aren’t well enough to be moving around so much.”

“You worry too much about me,” I responded, glaring at him. I gave up trying to move the coffin into a more suitable place and sat next to him on the coffin. 

“I’m in charge of you, so I should be concerned over your health,” Undertaker held out a cookie for me to take. He nibbled on the other one in his hand while I just held my hand.

“Did you finish all your work for today?” It was hard to make small talk with someone who had been ignoring me all day. 

“I finished it all.”

“Is there something wrong? You’ve been awfully quiet today.”

“Were you worried about me, Rachel? Hehehe~.”

“I-I guess so, but was there something wrong?”

“No. I just love my work. If you want, I’ll let you help me tomorrow.”

“I think I’ll stay out of your way. If you like it so much, then I’ll leave you to it.”

We were quiet for a few more minutes. He leaned back on the coffin. Crumbs were lying about on his robes. There was quiet need that lingered in the back of mind to brush them away, but I pushed it out of my mind. 

There was a knock on the door that brought us both out of our thoughts. Undertaker stood up and brushed the crumbs off of his robes and went to open the door. I looked at the ground and stood up. It was getting really late, who could be at the door?

I moved back into the kitchen, fetching some tea and heating water. Undertaker’s voice, along with another voice, reached into the kitchen. I pulled down some beakers that were by the sink. They looked clean, so I brought them out with the tea and boiling water.

“Rachel! You look lovely,” Grell ran up to me.

“Hello, Grell. Would you like some tea?” I sat everything down and poured the water and tea into the beakers and handed one to Undertaker.

“I’m not going to be here long, but thank you darling!” Grell turned toward Undertaker, “William sent you some paperwork to fill out for Rachel. He wants it back ASAP.”

“Okay, I can do that. Thank you for the tea, Rachel,” Undertaker sat the tea on the coffin near him and took a packet from Grell.

“Are you doing okay, Rachel?” Grell asked. His voice was sounded as though he was genuinely worried about me. 

“I’m doing well,” I took a sip of my tea, “How’re you?”

“I’m wonderful! But William also needed some help later tonight! It’s going to a lot of work, and he said he would clear out your library fines,” Grell continued.

“We can help. I finished everything for today anyway,” Undertaker looked toward me. I nodded in agreement with him. 

I was giddy with excitement. Undertaker and Grell talked for a while longer before Grell left us alone again.

“Is what you’re wearing okay for you work in?” Undertaker took the beakers into the kitchen and sat them in the sink while I was following him.

“Yes, why wouldn’t it be?” 

“It doesn’t look comfortable.”

“It’s fine. But I do have another question.”

Undertaker moved back into the main room. He picked up a long cloak and handed it back to me. 

“Who were you talking about earlier? I still want to know,” I pulled the cloak over me and looked at him again. His face was tilted up and had a slight knowing smirk on it.

“It was you. Your corpse was breathtaking. I marveled at your beauty before putting the lid on. I left the lid off for almost an hour after I received you. I almost didn't want to see you in the ground," Undertaker smiled at him. 

I felt my cheeks getting red, “You were talking about me? Is that why you took me in? You really thought my dead body was beautiful?” 

“You were the most beautiful one I had ever seen, but we have stuff to do right now,” Undertaker took out his scythe and handed my mine to me.

“Undertaker-” I started but he leaned his forehead against mine and lightly brushed his lips over mine.

“We’ll talk later, okay?” Undertaker pulled on his hat and started to the door. My face flushed a little, and I stayed in the spot he left me in.

“Rachel, are you coming?” Undertaker called back to me.

“Yes I’m coming, sorry,” I ran after him. 

“We have to go to downtown London, so we’ll take a short cut there. We don’t want to miss any of the fun,” Undertaker giggled and used his scythe to open a portal. 

He let me go first into the portal and closed it after he went through. We were stand in a cargo room inside of a boat. Undertaker had the bowl of bone shaped cookies with him. A boy walked out from the in between the carts.  
Undertaker held out the bowl, and the boy went to take one, but Undertaker pulled it away and took one for himself. I frowned and took one out of the bowl and handed it to him. He looked a little familiar to me, but I couldn’t think of who it was.  
Undertaker explained to him why we were here. He let the boy have the rest of the cookies which he ate quickly. I felt bad for him. He was dressed like a noble, yet he seemed to have not eaten in days.  
Voices rang down from above. I looked toward Undertaker, asking him what do to do silently. We walked above deck to be met with the city completely ablaze. The boy was in shock. Undertaker whistled, and I turned away from the two.  
I started to the front of the deck. The city was getting closer, and the flames were getting higher and higher. I heard Undertaker come up behind me, but he suddenly turned and addressed the boy again.  
He grabbed my waist, and we landed in London. The fire was burning slowly. It was everywhere and bodies littered the ground. I stayed right behind Undertaker. The souls had already been reaped where we were.

“Wasted youth is one of the privilages of youth isn’t it?” Undertaker asked Grell, who had been feverishly cutting the souls out of the bodies.

“What do you mean wasted?” Grell retorted back. 

I looked at both of them. The souls around here looked different. They weren’t like the souls from the previous night. They were black, completely black, and the record was mixed through the black parts. 

“You see all the black matter. It’s made up of all the jawing agony that belong with the dead. You see it’s what humans call the-” 

“The heart,” I cut Undertaker off. It sounded so familiar to me. I should know what it was, but it was just fragments. There was a memory there, but it was fogged over.

“These hearts are extracted from their souls. They can hardly be called souls now. I doubt very much that they can be stored in the Reaper’s Library anymore,” Undertaker finished. He smiled a little bit, but 

“Why! Why should something like a heart matter?” Grell cut into a body near his feet and let a very blank record pour out. He screamed a little in surprise, “I don’t understand! The records are blank?!”

I moved around Undertaker and stood by Grell. His constant emotions made me more anxious to be around him. He was too over the top with showing emotions.

“So some’s plundering souls,” Footsteps came closer to us from the outer side of the city.

“Will!” Grell practically screamed in my ear.

“Ah, the taking of souls is necessary. It is the property of Reapers. On just this one occasion- I’m willing to take on unpaid overtime. Here Grell Sutcliff,” William tossed Grell something which Grell took with too much enthusiasm. 

I turned back to Undertaker while William explained everything else to the group behind him. Undertaker was frowning at the sight around him. We still had to collect the souls even though they wouldn’t be worth anything. 

“Rachel, what do you see?” Undertaker whispered.

“Not much. It’s like the records are mixing in with the hearts, so it doesn’t look like anything except bodies lying out here.”

“Well then go collect some souls. I’ll be around if you need anything,” Undertaker smiled at me and walked into the deep part of the city.

I walked toward the alleyways where there were still souls that I could barely see. I could hear people still dying in the distance as the fire torched their bodies. Though as I entered another alley, I heard a small cry from inside it.

There was a baby wrapped in a blanket lying next to its dead mother. I felt a pang of loneliness while looking at the baby. It wasn’t fair that it should have to slowly die here- alone. It doubted that it would okay if I took the soul before it’s time, so I would blame it on not being able to tell the difference.

I cut out the soul and recorded it quickly before running back to the other people who still needed to be recorded. I started to reap quickly, not caring about the actual recordings because they were completely blank.

Dawn broke right before I met back with Undertaker and the rest of the group. I was tired from the long night and just wanted to go to sleep.

"All the accounted souls were successfully reaped, good job everyone one. I mentioned earlier that there would be an all-expense paid party today," William reminded everyone. 

I stopped listening and followed Undertaker back to the shop. He wrapped his arm around my waist while his scythe disappeared into thin air. I was grateful for the sudden support.

"We aren't going to the party?" I asked groggily.

He shrugged, "I have guest to attend to, so I suggest that you go to sleep when we get back." 

“Okay, but you need to show me how to make my scythe disappear and reappear when I want it to okay?” I asked, leaning against him even more. He chuckled and took my scythe before we landed in front of his shop. 

Undertaker opened the door, and I trudged into the shop. My coffin was open, so I laid down in it and was about to pull the lid shut when something stopped it.

Undertaker leaned down and gently kissed my lips. I opened my eyes in surprise while he pulled back and smiled at me. He kissed my forehead and then closed the coffin.

“Have a nice sleep, Rachel,” Undertaker said. I touched my forehead and smiled a little. It was nice to have someone who kissed me like that.


	4. A Trip Outside

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is just an inbetween chapter. It's entire purpose is to condense things down, so it's rather boring. I'm sorry! I'll try to update again really soon

I slept through the day and well into the night. Undertaker removed the lid from the coffin about midnight and woke me up. I glared at him before rolling over and closing my eyes again. Undertaker probably frowned and shook my shoulder a little bit.

“You’ve been asleep for over 12 hours, dearie. It’s time to get up,” He tried to coaxed me awake.

“Have I really?” I turned my head to look at him.

“It seems as though you really wore yourself out last night,” Undertaker held out an actual cup for me to take. 

“I didn’t think I was so exhausted. Thank you,” I took the cup and took a small sip from it.

Undertaker sat down on a coffin in front of me while I sipped on my tea. The room was deathly silent. Undertaker was staring off into the space above where I was sitting. He had a slight grin on his face.

“Why are smiling like that?” I asked, smiling as well.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Undertaker looked down at me. 

I smiled a little bit and stepped out of the coffin. Undertaker reached out to catch me if I suddenly fell. I looked at his outstretched arms and frowned.

“I don’t need you to treat me like I’m weak,” I started to the kitchen. 

As I was walking to the kitchen, I almost did fall but caught myself in time. Undertaker had a smirked on his face when I glanced behind me. Shaking my head, I set the empty cup by the sink and moved back into the other room.

“I have to out in the morning,” Undertaker explained, “You need to stay here and read over some book I found.”

“Okay, but why can’t I go with you?” 

“You need learn all of that, so it would be easier for you to read it now.”

“I’ll start now then.”

Undertaker pointed to a stack of books on his desk. I ran my fingers through my hair, detangling it as gently as I could. I frowned when my hair wasn’t even close to being smooth, but I picked up a book and started to read it in the dim light of the candles around the room.

Undertaker walked into a back room and left me alone until the sunlight came through the door. He reemerged from the room and took his hat off a shelf.

“I’ll be back later, dearie, be good,” Undertaker kissed my head and walked out of the door.

I set the book down and looked at the door. He had locked it from the outside when he left. I frowned and looked at the book. The book was actually quite boring and repetitive. It was about the demon world, but it only talked about the hierarchy of the demons and how demons were made.

I glanced at the rest of the books. All of the books were history of reapers, angels, or humans. I frowned at his choices. Though he did say I needed to know the information, so there must be a reason.

I continue with the book. It took me another hour to actually finish the book, but Undertaker still hadn’t returned. I set the book down and frowned at the door again. He had never shut and locked the door before. If a body needed to be dropped off, they wouldn’t be able to drop it off.

I grabbed the next book and stared at it. Setting it back down, I stood up from the desk. The door suddenly jingled, and I jumped back. Undertaker waltzed in and handed me a long box. It was remotely shaped like a coffin.

“What is this?” I asked quietly. The box was smooth and interesting.

“Why don’t you open it and see, dearie?” Undertaker sat down on the desk, watching me play with the box.

I nodded and removed the lid. The box held a very fancy and expensive looking brush. I picked it up gently and looked at it more. The back had a perfectly carved skull on it. It looked to be made of ivory and had a small ruby on one of the teeth.

“It’s absolutely beautiful,” I whispered, “Why would you get this? It looks too expensive.”

“You kept messing with your hair, so a beautiful brush for a beautiful woman,” Undertaker smiled a little and held out his hand, “Allow me?”

I held out the brush for him to take. His nimble fingers held the brush carefully. He easily pulled the brush through my hair. I didn’t expect him to be so gently yet firm with the brush.

“You’re really good at this,” I smiled a little bit as he continued to run the brush through my long hair.

“I brush the corpse’s hair, and if you pull too hard, then the hair gets pulled out, and it’s not pretty,” Undertaker explained with smoothing out my hair. He set the brush down and grabbed the box again. He pulled out something else and pulled my hair back.

“What are you doing now?” 

“I also got clips for you, so hold still for minute, dearie.”

“Why? Why did you bring me these things?” He expertly twisted my hair around and secured the strands.

“You look beautiful with your hair done up. Almost as beautiful as your corpse did.”

I felt my cheeks start to burn bright red. He finished with my hair and moved away from me. He turned my head slightly and stole kiss. I smiled a little a kissed him back. We took turns kissing each other before he grabbed a book, and I kissed the book instead.

“Finish reading while I work on the guests,” Undertaker handed me another book and grinned. 

I frowned and took the book from him. The book was shorter which made me really happy. It shouldn’t take me a long time to finish reading. Undertaker moved to the back room again. I smiled again, reaching up to gently touch my hair.

He actually cared about me. He wasn’t just using me for his own enjoyment. I opened the book and started to read it. 

The day passed remotely smoothly, and Undertaker came back out a few hours before sunset. He took the book I was reading away and set it on the desk. My eyes were starting to hurt from the strain of reading all day, but I still glared at him.

“You have a death list tonight. You’ll be doing this one by yourself, but I’ll be near if anything goes wrong,” Undertaker smiled a little bit and handed me the death list.

“Okay, so you’ll be coming along with me?” I asked, flipping through the list, “It’s a short list.”

“I’ll be there, but I’ll try to not interfere unless it’s absolutely necessary,” Undertaker explained, “The lists will be short until you’ve proven that you can finish a full list.”

“Oh, okay,” I grabbed my scythe and headed toward the door. Undertaker stopped and kissed me. I smiled a looked down.

The night went smoothly. Undertaker stayed back. Most of the time he was out of view, but I felt like he wasn’t the only one watching me. I kept looking over my shoulder just to see the emptiness behind me, but Undertaker felt my unease, and he started to move closer as the night carried on.

“Undertaker,” I looked up from the book I had been reading most of the day.

“Yes dearie?” He responded from the other room. Bodies had been delivered earlier that day. They were probably from the London fire because the bodies were completely charred.

“Are you not supposed to teach me other things?” I asked quietly.

“Like what?” Undertaker walked into the main room.

“Like a fighting skill? If I was attacked, then I would want to know how to fight back,” I responded, setting the book down on the desk.

“Who would want to fight such a beautiful lass like you?” Undertaker laughed a little bit.

“That’s not what I was saying! It could happen, Undertaker!” I leaned back in the chair and twirled a strand of hair that had fallen down.

“I’ll think about,” Undertaker frowned and walked back into the back room. 

I stared at the floor for moment. He had noticed the fact that someone had been watching me for a while now. Undertaker never outright commented on it, but by now I had finally noticed his reluctance to teach me anything besides the very basics of reaping.

The weeks flew by, and Undertaker always accompanied me on the reapings. He would rarely let me stay out to actually finish the lists. We made quite a few trips to the library where he left me alone for hours on end.

Undertaker would avoid any question about his teaching style. He always had another reason not to teach me anything I thought I needed to learn. I tried to argue with him after a bad night when I saw eyes of the person watching me. He easily avoided the topic and told me to go read another book he had brought back to the shop.

I made a plan one day and caught him off guard one day. I swung my scythe at him. For him to expertly block me, he had to use his. He easily unhanded me and pinned me against the wall. I glared at him, and he warned me to never do that again.

Grell would come by about once a week for William; they wanted to check on my progress. Undertaker would send me to do something for him, so I couldn’t hear what they were saying. Grell would leave after about an hour and I would go back to reading through something Undertaker got me. 

While we were in the library, I would wonder around the beautiful room. I didn't like to be in the Shinigami realm. It made me feel trapped, even when I would step outside. The human realm felt so much different. It was like the air itself was different. It felt so much more open.

I brought this up one day to Undertaker. He glanced up from the book he was looking through shrugged and chuckled a little. He explained that he had to do some sort of research, and it was easier if I stayed here with him.

He did leave me alone one day. I didn’t even question his motives as he left me alone. He warned me not to leave the shop. He kissed me and left soon after the warning. I looked around the room, trying to find something that might keep me in the shop, but I soon locked up the shop and walked into the city.

It was a bad idea. As soon as I left the shop, I felt eyes watching me. They weren’t as close as they bad been previous days. I hoped that when I got into the bustling streets that they would fade.

I walked around for a few hours, going through small shops and whatnot. Undertaker hadn’t left any money, so I couldn’t buy anything. It would be evidence that I left if I did buy anything.

I headed back to the shop. The sun was low on the horizon, and the air was slightly frigid. I wrapped my arms around my waist and picked up a slightly faster pace back to the shop. Silence surrounded me nicely. 

Though a hand touched my waist, and I immediately regretted not bring my scythe with me. I turned to the person that dared touch my waist without permission. 

“Rachel?” Red eyes met mine, causing me to back up into a wall. 

I nodded my head unintentionally. I shouldn’t have confirmed to him that that was my name.

“I’ve missed you darling,” He took a step forward and gently cupped my face.

“I don’t know who you are, but I really must be going. I’m so sorry!” I yelled as I tore myself from his touch and bolted to the shop which was miraculously unlocked.


	5. A Move

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is boring again. I'm so sorry but the plot line should be picking up again in the next chapter I swear

Undertaker was sitting on a coffin, facing the door as I bolted in. My face instantly paled as I took notice of his appearance. He was resting his head on his hand. I looked down and walked toward the kitchen.

“Rachel,” Undertaker called after me, “Come back here.”

“Yes?” I kept staring at the ground.

“Why were you outside?” He asked rather coldly.

“I needed some fresh air. I wasn’t out for long- I swear,” I looked at the ground, trying to hide my face. The lie was obvious, but I thought I might actually have a chance.

“You’ve realized that you’re being followed, but I wonder if you have realized who has been following you?” Undertaker giggled a little bit and leaned back.

“You know who’s been following me? Why haven’t you said anything before?” I turned around quickly. Anger slowly filled my head.

“Well now dearie, I didn’t say I knew, but I have known for a while that you’ve been watched from the shadows,” Undertaker stirred a cup of tea, “But I wanted you to find out on your own whom it was and tell me, so I could might could stop it before he hurt you.”

“I didn’t see him today,” There was the first major lie I ever told him. It just came out. I stared at him while he mentally debated about my words. 

“If you see him, you must let me know about it, Rachel,” Undertaker reached out and cupped my face.

I moved his hair away from his eyes and looked at the perfect rings of green and yellow. He leaned in and kissed my lips. I pulled away and leaned my forehead against his. I was still upset that he didn’t let me know about the man following me, but I felt that the pay back that I didn’t tell him the truth.

“Go get cleaned up. You’re still in trouble for disobeying my rules,” Undertaker turned away with his cup of tea and headed to the back, “When you’re finished, come back here. I have things for you to do.”

I walked into the kitchen and rinsed off my hands. I turned back to the main room and into the back room. I had never really been in here because it seemed too creepy to me with all the bodies and organs in glass jars.

“There is a pan of water over there. Clean up the girl in the back, Dearie,” Undertaker was leaning over a corpse on the table.

“Okay,” I picked up the rag that was in the pan and turned to the other corpse that was lying on the table. 

The woman’s face looked tired and worn. Her eyes and mouth were closed tightly. I wiped off her face and smoothed her hair back down on her head. I rinsed off the rag and continued to clean the body. 

Undertaker made me help him throughout the night. He refused to actually hold a conversation with me. He would tell me what to do or what not to do then go back to tending to the corpses.

I sneaked out of the room just before dawn and went to sleep in my coffin. I didn’t actually go to sleep; instead, I just laid in it, staring at the lid. I felt horrible about lying to Undertaker now, but I wasn’t about to tell him the truth.

Right before I fell asleep, the lid moved off the coffin. I glared at the intruding light and figures that were standing near me. I sat up and rubbed my tired eyes. The people looked at me quickly.

I glanced at Undertaker who seemed to still be mad. I immediately looked down at my hands which rested gently in my lap. I sighed and was about to lay back down when someone grabbed my shoulder.

“Rachel, you are being transferred to the dorms at HQ,” A very stoic, familiar voice echoed above me, “Please bring whatever you need, and we’ll leave in 10 minutes.”

“I- okay. I’ll be ready in 10 minutes,” I stepped out of the coffin and went to the back of the room. Undertaker followed behind me. He crossed his arms and stared at me.

“So you decided to give me up? I expected more from you, Undertaker,” I whispered angrily.

“I haven’t given you up yet. This is for your own good. It’s easy to protect you if you aren’t in the human realm,” Undertaker explained and wrapped his arms around my waist. 

“Then tell them to leave me here! If you care so much about me, keep me here!” I pleaded quietly.

“I’m worried, dearie,” Undertaker tried to explain, “It would so much easier to watch over you. The one that’s following you won’t be able to follow you there.”

“Come visit me then,” My voice wavered slightly; it was unfair that he was sending away like this, “Please.”

“I’ll stop by by the end of the week, but I must do something first,” Undertaker promised. He kissed me and hugged my tightly. 

I pulled away from him and picked up a small shoulder bag. I pulled some clothes into it. I closed the bag and moved toward the door; my head hung down unlike my normal posture. Undertaker was acting so distant from me because of one little thing.

“You’ll be able to finish your training after this blows over, but until then, please be good Rachel,” He lifted my head and kissed me again.

I pulled away and walked outside to the waiting group of Shinigami. It seemed like too many for a simple escort to the other realm. I turned to face the man who originally spoke to me, William. He turned and started to walk away.

“You’ll be staying near me Rachel!” The one with flaming red hair, “If you ever need anything, just ask me!”

I nodded a little bit. The moon was shining bright. It was full tonight, but the clouds started to cover it quickly. The changing weather made the night seem more saddening than before.

William transported us into the reaper realm. Grell immediately grabbed my arm and lead me to one of the buildings. It was a modern style building with very Victorian architecture. The area in front of the building was a large garden, but it was too dark to actually see what everything looked like. 

Grell lead me through the doors and down multiple hallways. The room he stopped at was on the second floor. He opened the door and let me in.

“You’ll have to decorate it, but I can help,” Grell offered. 

“There’s no point in decorating if I’m going to leave within a week,” I responded quickly, but the room was really, really plain.

“Oh you poor child,” Grell shook his head, “I’ll see you in the morning, Rachel.”

“Wait! What do you mean?” 

“Just keep your hopes up.”

Grell left the room quickly after, and I went to set the bag down on the empty desk. The bookshelf contained a few big books, probably reaper manuals. I pulled out the clothes and started to put them in the dresser.

“Rachel, you’re requested in William Spears’s office,” Someone knocked on the door.

I opened the door slowly to see another woman standing outside. She looked like a very tired secretary. I closed the door behind me and followed her down the hallways, trying to memorize the way, so I could find my way back.

The woman stopped outside a door and quickly knocked three times. William’s annoyed voice gave us permission to enter, so she left me alone outside the door. I opened the door and stepped inside.

"Rachel, sit down," William muttered to me as I stepped into his office, "You must be curious as to why we took you from your training so early."

"Why couldn't I stay with Undertaker?" I asked quietly, taking a seat in front of his desk.

"It was per request by Undertaker, and the only reason why we let you train there is because he was a very important person in our history, so naturally he gets a little leniency when it comes to stuff to like this." 

I nodded, "So I have to stay here not matter what?" 

"Grell will help you for the first day, but you will not be leaving for a while. Have a nice time, please don't cause me any overtime," William fixed his glasses and glared at me, “He’ll take you to get your glasses tomorrow morning before anything else.”

I let my hair fall in front of my face, "I don’t need glasses. I can see fine without them." 

“You must wear glasses here, so it’s in your best interest to wear them,” William argued back.

I wasn’t up for an argument, so I ignored him. Undertaker obviously wanted to get rid of me which made me feel like an idiot. This was just stupid; it was like those romance novels I read, but this was the ending.

“Go back to your room for now. The day starts at seven AM, so I expect you to up and ready by that time, “William explicitly explained; he waved me away, so he could continue his late night work.

I walked out the door and down the hallway. Everything was so plain in this building. The walls were a creamy white, and the carpet was a natural brown color. There were doors everywhere. It felt so claustrophobic and suffocating.

I found my room after wandering down two wrong halls and accidently entering someone else’s room. I felt my eyes start to water as I opened my door. I slammed it shut and fell down to my knees. Tears fell on the ground, making me feel worse than before. Why should I be crying over this? I knew this would happen.

I picked myself up and looked around the room. It was so plain – just like the rest of the building, but I didn’t plan to actually stay here long. Undertaker said I could go back after everything, so I didn’t know why I was crying.

I finished putting the clothes into the drawers and looked over the books that were already in the bookshelf. There were rule books and history books. I picked up one of the history books and flipped through it. 

I quickly put it down in disinterest. I turned off the light and crawled into the bed. I laid there for a while until I noticed how early it was. There really wasn’t a reason to go to sleep only to have to get up in two hours. 

Staring at the dark ceiling was starting to get boring, so I turned over to the window on the other of the room. The moon shone through nicely. It actually lit up the desk where a letter sat. I hadn’t noticed it earlier when I got back, so I walked over to it and grabbed the letter.

My name was written in beautiful calligraphy, but there was nothing else on the front of the letter, so I opened it and pulled out a piece of paper. It was a short letter, obviously addressed to me. I skimmed over it.

It was an apology from earlier that day. I looked at the bottom to see who sent it, but the only thing there was a single letter, A. Not Undertaker obviously. The one who tried to talk to me right outside Undertaker’s shop!

He could reach me here too unless it was someone here. It could be anyone now. I shoved the letter back into the envelope and threw it into a desk drawer. If anyone found out that the one stalking me could come here, then I would be forced to stay here for a lot longer. 

I sat down in the chair and rested my head in my hands. It was going downhill so fast. I could hardly keep my mind from spinning. The moon was setting now, and people were walking down the hall outside the room. I might as well wait for Grell to come and get me.

I turned the chair around when a knocked sounded from the door. I stared at the door for a minute before opening it. A woman about the same height as me was standing there.

"Yes?" I asked, sounding a bit too tired to actually care.

"Hello, may I come in please?" She responded back.

I opened the door and let her into my room, "Do you need something?" 

"I was called to make an outfit for you. It’s actually a uniform, but if you want then I can customize a few parts," She explained, making me realize that almost everyone woman I saw was wearing the same thing.

“Oh, well, instead of round buttons, can you put in skull or bone buttons?” I asked quickly. 

“I’ll see what I can do, but let me take the measurements for now,” The woman took out a measuring tape.

I stood completely still while she measured everything. It was like they were forcing me to become more and more like them. Maybe if I looked like all of them then the one stalking me would get confused and stop.

She left soon after without asking me if I wanted anything else. I sighed and stared back out the window, "The moon even shines even out here. What a cruel world I live in."


	6. The Kind of Work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for such a later chapter, school has been killing me.

Grell knocked on the door a few minutes after she left. I opened the door for him and let him in. He walked him and frowned at me.

 

“Is something wrong Grell?” I asked quietly.

 

“Will is throwing all his work on me! I don’t mind doing it, but I wish he would acknowledge me when I do do it,” Grell hastily explained.

 

“I’m sorry, but what’re we supposed to be doing?” It was going to be a long day.

 

“Will said to go get you glasses then to show you around and where you’ll be working until you can go and help reap again,” Grell explained obviously still upset about the work he had to do.

 

“I won’t be reaping?” I asked slowly. Of course if I went into the human realm, then it would be an even greater chance that I’ll be confronted by the one stalking me, but it still made me feel bad.

 

“No, but we have a long day ahead of us, so hurry up,” Grell tapped his foot impatiently.

 

I nodded my head and ran my finger through my hair. I must have left the brush with Undertaker. I followed Grell out of the room and down hallways. He rambled on and on about Will and the human realm. It made me slightly sick to hear him constantly speak of the place where I wanted to be.

 

We walked outside and through the garden in between the buildings. It was a lot more vibrant than last night. I looked around at all the flowers and trees. Grell continued to talk as we walked through it.

 

The next building was a little bit like the dorm. Grell lead me to a hallway and opened one of the many doors. He ushered me inside and shut the door.

 

“Hello, how can I help you?” A voice called from a desk.

 

“She needs a pair of glasses,” Grell uninterestingly explained.

 

“Okay, well we can make a new pair within the next hour,” The man explained, “They’ll be standard black with rectangular frames.”

 

“We’ll be back soon,” Grell waved to him and pulled me out of the door, “Did the seamstress come by your room already?”

 

“Oh, yes she did. She took my measurements and left,” I slowly explained.

 

“Let’s go to the place you’ll be working in,” Grell frowned, “I have to work tonight, so I won’t be able to help you after this, so remember the way, okay?”

 

“I think I can do that, sorry for the inconvenience,” I muttered hatefully.

 

We walked through the building and to the next floor. There were offices after offices on the floor. People were writing down things and looking through files. Death lists were laying on desks and on the floor.

 

“Is this the new girl?” A woman asked, “I’m Elizabeth. You’ll be working underneath me.”

 

“Oh, okay. I’m Rachel,” I responded quickly.

 

Grell left shortly after our meeting. He apparently had more important things to do than to babysit me. He had already lost me once, so I didn’t want him to do it again.

 

She showed me how to write death lists and what I would be doing while I was here. It seemed like they were just trying to keep me prisoner. I was sitting next to Elizabeth the entire time, but mostly I was running around, delivering papers to other people in the room.

 

She sent me to pick up my glasses which I begrudgingly did. I put them on, but the once clear world assaulted my sight with blurry and odd shapes. I wanted to take them off, but I didn’t want to risk upsetting my already upset boss, so I left them on and stumbled back to my job.

 

I couldn't sleep at all that night. It didn't feel right that I was here, on an open bed, no wooden walls to protect me. I stared at the light pouring into the room from the window. My glasses were haphazardly thrown on my desk.

 

My light brown hair fell around my eyes. It needed to be cut. No one could know I was different, and if anyone saw my eyes then they would know, but I couldn’t wear my glasses. I needed to see to be able to do almost anything.

 

I stood up I grabbed my scythe, which was surprisingly still in my room, and cut my hair to cover up my eyes. Now my bangs would cover the eyes that seemed to get me into trouble. No one would notice that I wasn’t wearing glasses. I crawled back into bed and attempted to sleep.

 

"Maybe I come in?" The girl from yesterday knocked rather loudly on my door.

 

"Yes, come in," I sat up and ruffled my hair to cover my eyes.

 

"I brought you the clothes I made," She had a few dresses, most of which looked exactly like the other women were wearing yesterday.

 

"Thank you very much. They’re very nice!" I smiled lightly and took the dresses from her.

 

“If you need anything else, just ask Grell where to find me,” She waved a little and left the room.

 

I hung the dresses in the closet only to realize that a few of them did have little skulls as buttons. She actually listened to me. Someone actually cared about me enough to listen to me.

 

I quickly changed into a dress and ran my fingers through my hair. It was horrible, yet I couldn’t tie it back. Someone might notice that I’m not wearing glasses and get me in trouble.

 

I quickly hurried to the building the day before and began the same tedious work from before. Of course everyone here tried to be nice and help me when I needed it, but I just wanted to be alone.

 

The week passed extremely slowly, and Elizabeth told me I could have Friday and Saturday off. I relished the fact that I could sleep as long as I wanted.

 

My long sleep was interrupted when someone sat on the edge of my bed. I opened my eyes slightly, trying not to alert them that I was awake to see who it was. Long gray hair greeted my vision, so I opened my eyes completely and frowned.

 

“I didn’t mean to wake you so early, dearie,” Undertaker laughed a little.

 

“You actually kept your promise,” I mumbled sleepily.

 

He leaned over and kissed my forehead, “Did they give you glasses?”

 

I nodded and gestured somewhere else in the room. I thought they were still resting on my desk, but they were gone. I shrugged and laid back down.

 

“Do you mind?” Undertaker asked, and I shook my head. He laid down next to me and wrapped his arm around me.  


I shouldn’t have let him come back so easily. I was accepting his obvious abandonment and forgiving him for it. It wasn’t right, but nothing was right anymore, was it? His embrace was warm and comforting just like it was before.

 

“Since you’re here, you have to answer my questions,” I demanded quietly, wishing my voice was stronger than that. The weakness had come from the absolute desperation I had felt all week. Daring him to disagree with me, I glanced up at him.

 

“I’ll answer them as well as I possibly can, okay?” Undertaker responded. He tightened his grip on me.

 

"Am I the only one who sees the record before reaping the soul?"

 

"You have special eyes, Rachel, we don't quite understand why you have them,” Undertaker replied rather quickly. Maybe too quickly, but I continued on with the questions.

 

“Then why do I have to wear glasses? Are you hoping that I’ll stop seeing them if you ruin my vision?”

 

“It’s not like that Rachel. They’re just trying to integrate you into the rest of the reapers. You should be happier here anyway,” Undertaker offered much slower than before. He meant it. He meant it so much.

 

“I’m not happy.”

 

“It takes time.”

 

“Stop lying.”

 

Undertaker moved his hands and lay back, staring off into space. He reached around to pull my head to him, but I shoved his hand away, closing my eyes and pushing myself next to the wall.

 

“It’s better this way,” Undertaker frowned.

 

“Leave.”

 

“Rachel.”

 

“Leave, Undertaker.”

 

“Ra-,” Undertaker immediately decided that that wasn’t the best thing to argue over. He stood up and walked to the door.

 

“Who’s following me?” I asked. It was the last thing I wanted to know. If he wasn’t going to help me, then I would help myself.

 

“Rachel,” Undertaker started, “It’s none of your concern. I’ll fix the problem.”

 

“Leave.”

 

The door softly shut, and I screamed into the pillow under my head. I wasn’t a child. I didn’t need _anyone’s_ protection. I could protect myself. I needed to leave soon, so I could finish this and get back to _my_ actual job.

 

Though if I didn’t know who was stalking me, then how could I figure out where they would be. They could be anywhere. The note left on my desk was enough reminder to remember that. Though if I just up and left, then I wouldn’t just have the stalker to worry about.

 

I’ll need someone on the inside to help me, but most people were against me. I screamed into my pillow again, and I thought I heard a slight knock on my door. Shrugging it off as nothing, I stood up and took off the sleeping gown.

 

I didn’t hear the sound of footsteps retreating down the hallway either. The dress I pulled over my head fell at my knees and I pulled my hair back into a messy bun and left my room, leaving my glasses carelessly tossed somewhere in the mess.

 

I needed resources, so the library was the first place I needed to go. The library came into view, but someone immediately blocked the view of it.

 

“They need you in the office, Rachel!~” Grell grabbed my arm.

 

“But it’s my day off! I need to go get some book first!” I pulled out of his grip and moved to enter the library.

 

“Don’t be that way, but they still need to see you. It shouldn’t take more than a mere second,” Grell spun me around to face the direction of the office and gently pushed me.

 

Just so he would leave me alone I walked to the office. As I entered, Elizabeth handed me a stack of paper with a pen.

 

“Get to work. My boss told me to revoke your day off, so sit down and start working,” She turned away and went back down to her desk.

 

I felt anger rise up, but I swallowed it down and sat down. I went to work quietly. So this was how it was. If I went out on my own, then I would have the privileges taken away.

 

I finished the work after the sun went down, and Grell showed up to escort me back to the room. He was humming as we walked down the hallway.

 

“Do you need anything, Rachel?” Grell’s voice was suddenly quiet and thoughtful.

 

I shrugged, "I'm tired, and I'm going to go to sleep, so no."

 

Grell nodded and turned away. He walked down to his room and looked back at me. I waved and opened the door. My room was dark. The blinds were pulled closed. Strange.

 

I stumbled to window and pulled open the blinds. The window was still tightly shut, so I didn’t worry very much until I noticed the letter on my desk. It was in an envelope and sealed with a beautiful blood red seal. Of course. I need to throw away the letter, but I opened it anyway.

 

_Rachel,_

_I know that you don’t remember who I am, but I remember you. I remember how beautiful you were, and how happy you were when you were with me, with us. We were happy. I wish you would come back to us, but when I tried to bring you back to us, you screamed and fought me. I didn’t mean to hurt you. Forgive me Rachel._

_I’ll be back in a fortnight, so be prepared. We had hoped that you would come with us but after you met him, we had to rethink everything. You’re so wonderful, but the ones there can’t teach you anything. They don’t love you like we do. Come back with us Rachel._

_We’ll love you forever._

_~A_


End file.
